Category Archives: Hard Grace

Winter Winds

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There is a chill in the air.  It is the breath of “old man winter” blowing softly in.  I am not sure if I am ready to welcome this change but yet, my readiness doesn’t prevent its coming.  I haven’t been prepared for many things in my life.  Still, they came ready or not.

The seasons are God’s gentle reminders that life is not intended to be stagnant.  It is meant to change and transform.  The living and growth often follows times of death and slumber.  Winter precedes spring.  Nature is His handiwork and a testimony to our hearts of His presence in all of creation.  Its wonder surrounds and yet, we still miss its grand design.

We live our lives so busy insisting we must do and be more than He ever destined for us.  I wonder how many times we have ventured far off the trail He has placed before our feet.   We find ourselves caught in the whir of a life out of control.  It is our doing, not His.  In His plan falls a rhythm, a season of sorts.  In ours, the cadence runs sporadic and wild.  Rest becomes elusive and purpose is disoriented.

We begin to lose ourselves.

Even more tragic, we begin to lose our sight of Him.

 You never go away from us, yet we have difficulty in returning to You.   Come, Lord, stir us up and call us back. Kindle and seize us. Be our fire and our sweetness. Let us love. Let us run. 

St Augustine

Come sweet winter winds remind us with your breath that even in stark and barren moments, His hand still moves and His heart can still be found.  Draw us back from wild chaos and into the gentle rhythm of His grace.

A Night’s Surrender

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It is a moment of surrender when I leave the cocoon of my bed to wrestle with a wide awake mind in the shadows of the night.  To give up the comfort of sweet slumber and lean into the darkness.  I search for purpose and reason for this rustling of heart and soul but searching doesn’t mean finding.  Tonight was one of those answerless nights.

It is a night when words echo back like a slumbering breath – when darkness obscures vision and my heart begs to see.  Yet, in this hollow moment my soul feels strangely warmed.  For even now when I feel most alone, His Presence beckons me to come.

Come into the darkness and reach for the hand of God.

 I entrust my spirit into Your hands.  You have redeemed me, O Eternal, God of faithfulness and truth.

Psalm 31:5 The Voice

Linger Long…

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Linger long, my friends, in the present moment.  Don’t miss out on the blessings of a hug, a kiss or even a simple conversation.   This life is too short – our breath too fleeting – to miss the grace and beauty of our now.  Don’t worry about tomorrow’s plans.  They only distract you from the gift of today.

Tomorrow is not here nor is it promised. 

Inhale today…yes, even when it is hard to breathe…like yesterday when the heaviness was so thick and palpable.  Death and pain wielded their striking blows…2 killed in a motorcycle accident; 13 dead at the Navy Yard; 1 helicopter landing in the parking lot for yet another accident.  No answers to why but truth be told – the whys really don’t matter.  It doesn’t change what has become the “new” now. 

This – our “new” present – may have begun with tears but while we still breathe this earthly air  we can’t miss the grace and truth that remains in our agony. 

 The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.  Deuteronomy 31:8

When anger for answers seeks to steal your breath – fight all the harder to inhale the Truth that He was here even before you were and He is here with you now.

When loneliness creeps in to steal your joy – praise all the louder that He will never leave you or forsake

When fear tries to paralyze you – move ahead in the strength only He can give. 

Father God, move the heavens for those who are hurting.  Shine your grace, your love and your comfort on the hearts of those who have lost so much – move back the darkness of the enemy that seeks cover this world in its grip.  Oh God, our hearts grieve with those who will never have another moment to hold that one who went to work and never came home.  Rise up people in their lives who will speak your Truth – bring your comfort into this situation.  Overwhelm them with your love.  May they find the strength to praise you in the midst of their pain.  May they hunger for your presence and seek you with their whole being.  Thank you Lord… that even when we cannot feel you or see you – Your Presence remains…faithful forever.  In Jesus name, I pray.  Amen.

 

A New York State of Heart…

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Just a few days back home and my heart remembers… 

 

In a city that never sleeps there are too many whose sleep is now endless.  Only pools gather where our tears remain – where the waters fall deep into the abyss of forever.

 

 

Lessons learned in minutes can hang secure on walls and ceilings.

 

 

Teamwork accomplishes much when numbers may equal only a few.

 

 

Devastation here is more often behind closed doors where basements flooded and life floated.  Now, the slow process of beginning again hangs with each piece of drywall.

 

Please pray for Gus who is waiting patiently for his home to be finished and for the many just like him who are living in the after effects of Superstorm Sandy. 

 

Feeding of Faith

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Remember the wonders he has done, his miracles and the judgements he pronounced. 

Psalm 105:5

 

 

They crack crisp under my feet.  These fallen leaves from glory high lay as a reminder of passing time.  I don’t know if I necessarily need a reminder for as much as these dry leaves break brittle under feet, my cracking joints sing similar songs.

Yet, wanted or not, they remind.  Speak volumes of the fleeting moments that make up our lives.  Minutes that together form seasons bringing forth life and death.  Seasons that wax and wane with a rhythm so familiar and yet each a mystery we wait to unfold. 

 

 

Faith, my friend, walks to destinations unknown.  It moves in the waiting.  It is a seeking anticipation.  Not a life deferred.   When the seasons change our living we must strive to look beyond the ebb.  We must gather our remembrances of grace that once was and take it as manna into our wandering. 

A feeding of faith for the journey ahead and at its table today I gather to give thanks.  For all that was…for all that is…for all that is to come.   

Gratitude is born in hearts that take time to count up past mercies.  – Charles Edward Jefferson