Category Archives: Hard Grace

Redemption Still Comes

 

I don’t want to find myself here – again – but that is just where I am.  I am sitting with my regret wanting to give up.  I keep trying not to do this and yet, I do it – over and over again.  It taunts and tears at me until I feel like I have nothing left to fight with and I crumble under its weight.

She, too, lived a broken life.  A life crushed by the weight of bad choices and weak faith.  On this night, she came with little more than a scarred reputation and an alabaster jar.  She knew the ridicule she would encounter when she entered the room.  It was hers to live every day with these people.

Yet, she came. 

She came now because she wanted to know the depth and breadth of a love far greater than their whispers could ever reach.  She came with a boldness that was birthed from pain.  She came with a faith alive and willing to pour out.  She came broken and ready to love with abandon the One who gave her the only thing worth having – redemption. 

Mine has been a faith that settled for far too less – one that whimpered more of my lack than His strength.  I have come carrying far more than I should because I haven’t believed that He can and will.  This is the life that has been mine, not the life that should be His.

Broken and crumbled, I beg at His feet for the faith to believe beyond what I do.  For a faith that trusts beyond the “what if” and has strength surpassing the “I can’t”.  

It is what He has wanted all along – a broken realization that I cannot and that I have not.  But a hope that He will. 

Her tears were the cleansing of grace overflowing.  Her alabaster jar briefly held the treasure of a faith now grasped and its fragrance of mercy now permeated the air.

Redemption came and in peace she went.

Failure seeks to break me. 

He wants transform the me that is broken. 

Redemption still comes – just as I am.

 

Joining in:

How to Begin Again

The sun has yet to rise this morning but the dog is stirring.  I should get up and let her out but I lie here not yet ready to have my feet hit the floor.

Some days are hard to start.  Especially when the starting is admitting once again that the habit I had wanted to begin yesterday will need to begin today.

 I tried yesterday.  I failed yesterday.  Here and now I lie comfortably in my dilemma. 

In the dark not all things are quiet.

The Spirit begins to whisper.  “What you have planned is a good thing but is it the right thing?

Like David who had it in his heart to build a temple for the Ark of the Covenant, I hold in my heart good intentions.   

In his heart man plan his course but the LORD establishes his steps.   Proverbs 16:9 NIV

Good intentions are not always God intentions. 

The prophet Nathan had to tell David He was not the one who would build the temple.   I may not have a Nathan but the Word speaks with clarity.

Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed.  Proverbs 16:3 NIV

Begin here with Him.  It is where it all began and where it all begins again.

Trust God from the bottom of your heart; don’t try to figure out everything on your own.  Listen for God’s voice in everything and everywhere you go; he’s the one who will keep you on track.  Don’t assume that you know it all.  Proverbs 3:5-7 The Message

This day – this very special day – the dog stirs my body awake and the Spirit, likewise, my heart. 

Feet slowly hit the floor but only to pause before falling to knees. 

This is how to begin again.

 

Joining in:

 

Change Me

 

Change me but don’t make me whole – at least not yet.

Fix what is broken but leave the cracks.  Through fissures You are seen.  Fractures show Your glory and tell of my weakness.  I need my weaknesses to be told because I don’t tell them often enough. 

I try to hide them with distance and a smile. 

When did I believe weak wasn’t worthy?  When did the Truth of …(Your) power is made perfect in weakness…lose to the lie that perfect is worth pretending to be?

Change me Lord, but don’t make me whole – at least not yet.

Mend what is broken but leave the cracks.  Their presence will be Your grace.  Broken will be my testimony. 

 

Joining in with:

 

Five Minute Friday

This is the place we write for 5 minutes – no more – no less – no editing. It might not be perfect but it is real!

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Beholding Glory

Hard Grace

 

It is the diamond in the rough. 

It is the beauty hidden in the broken and trampled.

It is the precious found in the overlooked and forgotten.

It is the beloved found in the discarded and unwanted.

Hard because it challenges, confronts and demands a response. 

Grace because it always is…grace.  Life is a gift –every single moment – straight from the hand of God.   These gifts when held come with a choice – to live, breathe and do something…or not. 

His gift

My choice

Hard Grace